A&H

Was I too harsh? Or maybe even too lenient?

QuaverRef

I used to be indecisive but now i'm not so sure
Level 4 Referee
Quick summary. White v blue. Player on whites continuously complaining at me regardless as to whether a decision has gone against him or not. Just your typical on the field commentator who has to do our job for us. Anyway, I've warned him a good 3/4 times in the first half to be quiet (I'm trying to be a bit careful with bookings unless something serious happens as it's the last game of the season in a mid table nothing game. Spare me the backlash from that). Second half comes around, he starts up again. I pull him to one side and warn him that enough is enough, next time is a booking. 5 minutes later, he's off again but this time he says to me 'you're a f'ing joke!'. I book him, arguably that could have been a red. After the booking I say 'look, I've warned you plenty of times, this really is your final warning'. He throws his arms up in the air and shouts 'oh whatever!'. Second booking

My question is, was my first booking too soft and my second booking harsh?
 
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Send him off for the first one if your are offended, or insulted!! Ticks the box with the extra F word added for me!!!

Saying that, if you've yellowed for that then your last card is very soft, no players like being booked and small comments follow, the words and action mentioned seems to be disappointment but YHTBT....
 
I'd booked him on the 3rd one then if he did say anything after that then you could of sent him the 1st yellow earlier could of shut him up though
 
Why did you warn him 3-4 times? All you're doing is showing him, and all other players, that you're not actually prepared to follow through with cards.
Follow your roadblocks. Quiet word on the fly. Keeps it up, pull him aside. Next one is a card. Don't keep warning players - if he hasn't heeded warnings already then a card will be needed. Players like this undermine your entire match control and influence others to dissent.

As for the first card - could be either way here. I've sent off players and cautioned them for saying this. Depends on a number of factors.

As for the 2nd caution - well, he's clearly shown disrespect from throwing his arms up and shouting out like that. In isolation I have no problem with the yellow here. I think you've got yourself backed into a corner here because you gave him so many warnings. Had the normal roadblocks procedure been followed you might have gotten away with letting it slide or even calling the captain in to help. But because you gave him so many warnings, another warning here just sends a weak message so I don't think you had a choice.

But look at it this way - you've given him many more chances than he should have. He said something which is arguably worth a red card, then keeps going. 100% he deserved to be sent off.
 
short and sweet, but for me too lenient with the timing of the first, second one would probably have come at that exact point in any case so spot on.
 
All your problems have come from this attitude. If it's a nothing game they wouldn't need a ref

Can't argue that to be fair. I'd realised pretty quickly what I'd set myself up for ...


short and sweet, but for me too lenient with the timing of the first, second one would probably have come at that exact point in any case so spot on.

Yep, agree with that. At this point, I'm not really sure why I went in with the attitude of 'a nothing game'. Maybe trying to be too friendly with that approach. Either way, his first yellow in hindsight, should have been a second but I'd clearly backed myself into a corner.
 
Can't argue that to be fair. I'd realised pretty quickly what I'd set myself up for ...




Yep, agree with that. At this point, I'm not really sure why I went in with the attitude of 'a nothing game'. Maybe trying to be too friendly with that approach. Either way, his first yellow in hindsight, should have been a second but I'd clearly backed myself into a corner.
That's an attitude you should try and avoid - not because other referees will shout at you or anything like that, but because as soon as you look like a soft touch, players will get on your back regardless of the "nothingness" of the game.

Make your own life easier by being firm and as consistent as possible.
 
First comment - quick "watch it"
Second comment - "come here a minute" and gentle explanation you aren't there to be listen to constant dissent and for him to accept the decisions made.
Third comment - final warning already spoken to you twice
Fourth comment - Hello, nice to meet, you can you please tell me your name? Oh and have you met my blonde friend.

His actually comment you're a fxcking joke - bye bye enjoy your extended preseason.
 
Maybe you should've spoken to the player via the Captain after the second outburst. Quite right to caution but there comes a time when the talking has to stop and sanctions come into play regardless of what type of game it is. Cup final or end of season nothing to play for tyoe game.
 
Set the player up for a fall, don't set yourself up for the same. If you keep speaking to the same player it looks weak, they should only get one warning. The next time they transgress and the yellow comes out you just point at the place where the original discussion took place and say "well I told you / him what would happen".
 
Set the player up for a fall, don't set yourself up for the same. If you keep speaking to the same player it looks weak, they should only get one warning. The next time they transgress and the yellow comes out you just point at the place where the original discussion took place and say "well I told you / him what would happen".
Depends what you're counting as a warning.

If I'm stopping play and giving them a bollocking with everyone else standing around and waiting, that's absolutely their final warning. If we're having a chat during a natural break in play, it gets a little heated and I have to tell the player to back off, that generally means that the next time I'll still only escalate as far as a strict warning.
 
While the 2nd is easy to sell (any player who dances without music deserves it when the card comes out), you really have given him too much leeway before the 1st. Live and learn, that's all that matters. Acknowledging you've maybe made a mistake is halfway to avoiding making it a second time.
 
Depends what you're counting as a warning.

If I'm stopping play and giving them a bollocking with everyone else standing around and waiting, that's absolutely their final warning. If we're having a chat during a natural break in play, it gets a little heated and I have to tell the player to back off, that generally means that the next time I'll still only escalate as far as a strict warning.

That isn't a warning, that is a quiet chat. That certainly has a place in your game, but it isn't what we are talking about here. If you have a quiet chat with a player the whole world doesn't know that happened, if you give him a public warning everyone has seen it so the next time anything happens you have to deal with it.
 
Quick summary. White v blue. Player on whites continuously complaining at me regardless as to whether a decision has gone against him or not. Just your typical on the field commentator who has to do our job for us. Anyway, I've warned him a good 3/4 times in the first half to be quiet (I'm trying to be a bit careful with bookings unless something serious happens as it's the last game of the season in a mid table nothing game. Spare me the backlash from that). Second half comes around, he starts up again. I pull him to one side and warn him that enough is enough, next time is a booking. 5 minutes later, he's off again but this time he says to me 'you're a f'ing joke!'. I book him, arguably that could have been a red. After the booking I say 'look, I've warned you plenty of times, this really is your final warning'. He throws his arms up in the air and shouts 'oh whatever!'. Second booking

My question is, was my first booking too soft and my second booking harsh?
you lost me with why you are doing a game and trying to keep your cards in your pocket, as i tell my young referees we dont gve you them to keep them nice and dry/warm on your pocket
 
you lost me with why you are doing a game and trying to keep your cards in your pocket, as i tell my young referees we dont gve you them to keep them nice and dry/warm on your pocket

Yep, I became a much better referee when I became more relaxed about using my cards.
 
you lost me with why you are doing a game and trying to keep your cards in your pocket, as i tell my young referees we dont gve you them to keep them nice and dry/warm on your pocket

Yep, I became a much better referee when I became more relaxed about using my cards.

I agree, i knew id been a bit weak with my cards last season, and had some dissent based match control problems as a result.

This season i changed my approach, and while i am undoubtly still more lenient than others, becoming less tolerant of players and their shenanigans not only improved my reffing, but also made games more enjoyable as players quickly learn where the line is and most (not all) decide its not worth the hassle.

First caution of the season was about 10 minutes into my first game on a new league, gave a throwin, player about 20yds away obviously disagreed and shouted **** off ref! Instant caution and then no more dissent related issues for the remained of the game.
 
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