I don't think i can do it

[GraemeS]

I just think the reason it doesn’t sit well is because the comment didn’t really give any help. It was a blunt statement which didn’t offer the advice the OP was looking for. Personally, I think being harsh and tough does have its place and I know it has helped me before, but in this case, it wasn’t helpful

Exactly right. This is the "New Referees" section, specifically designed to help new referees who have gone out of their way to try and get advice. That shows a degree of self reflection and honesty that's vital for any referee who wants to succeed. Every top referee in the world has spent time thinking "what could I do better?" And as almost a page of posts show, it's very possible to give useful advice to someone who asks this kind of question.

Someone referenced an ex-member of this forum, and it's absolutely fair to say that the biggest falling out I had with him was for doing exactly this. And honestly, I'll happily do it again and again. I think telling someone to give up after just two matches is a really horrible thing to do - not "honest", not "truthful", just something only an awful person would even consider doing.

I'll happily accept whatever brand of "honesty" people want to throw at me elsewhere on here - but in this section, telling a brand new referee who only wants to improve to give up is just wrong, and needs to be resisted. And if I may say so, the reaction to me suggesting this has been fairly snowflakey....

 

[Mintyref]

Exactly right. This is the "New Referees" section, specifically designed to help new referees who have gone out of their way to try and get advice. That shows a degree of self reflection and honesty that's vital for any referee who wants to succeed. Every top referee in the world has spent time thinking "what could I do better?" And as almost a page of posts show, it's very possible to give useful advice to someone who asks this kind of question.

Someone referenced an ex-member of this forum, and it's absolutely fair to say that the biggest falling out I had with him was for doing exactly this. And honestly, I'll happily do it again and again. I think telling someone to give up after just two matches is a really horrible thing to do - not "honest", not "truthful", just something only an awful person would even consider doing.

I'll happily accept whatever brand of "honesty" people want to throw at me elsewhere on here - but in this section, telling a brand new referee who only wants to improve to give up is just wrong, and needs to be resisted. And if I may say so, the reaction to me suggesting this has been fairly snowflakey....

You may find that was the second part of the advice; only relevant if the recipient failed to measure up to the initial offering.........

 

[RustyRef]

Can I remind EVERYONE that this post is in the new referees section, and we should be offering suitable advice to such referees, and certainly not be bickering like a bunch of children. Honestly, any non-referee looking at this topic would cast serious doubt on the professionalism of their referees and it is, frankly, a bit embarrassing.

 

[Kes]

You may find that was the second part of the advice; only relevant if the recipient failed to measure up to the initial offering.........

Yep. Spot on.

Some people are just complete strangers to the truth though ...

 

[Big Cat]

Based on the limited information provided in the OP, jacking it in might well be the best advice offered. Persevering blindly with a self-professed unsuitable challenge would be folly. Refereeing is not for everyone, so @Kes was justified to bluntly indicate this and @ScottishRF may be thankful for this sensible advice

 

[Sheffields Finest]

Its like saying, 'I've tried plastering and I've made a complete horlicks of it, twice!.... should i continue messing up my mates wall or call it a day and leave it to someone who's obviously stuck with it and learnt the correct techniques. Or should i soldier on regardless and post on a plasterers advice forum for advice..He may need to some lower key walls as practice, who knows. or get someone to show and mentor his work.. Plastering isn't for everyone, just like refereeing!!! It may not be modern PC but its certainly not incorrect to point out that plastering may not be for you!!! (I'm also crap at plastering BTW)

 

[RustyRef]

OK, this has gone on for long enough.