A&H

Tolerance

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Oh I'd bet good money that we've all been tempted to say something along those lines once in a while!


Not a regular event and I choose the moment very carefully but yes that kinda thing has been known to spout out of my trap
One of my favs is when a player who comes on as a sub for a team thats 5-0 down tries to give you any kinda verbals..." mate your a sub for a team thats 5-0 down and you think you have a right to critise ME". Tends to hit the spot

Right time right place though and to be used with caution
 
Along same lines and again, if used right time right place and to right person , if somebody starting to give you gip, is

"Listen, when you missplace your pass do i shout at you? So see if i might have got a throw in wrong, just accept i could have made a mistake and get off my case"

Am not suggesting tackling all dissent with put down retorts. But, it can be something to keep in your locker for use on occasion.
 
We had two refs in my county done for telling a player to f$ck off in games last season
 
Which C word is the highest on your Bye Bye scale?
I've told this story on here before, but it's relevant:

Ball is crossed in, headed into the goal but the offside flag goes up. Attacker, on the penalty spot, screams to the AR 'you f****** cheating c***!!!!'
Red card, no hesitation.
Teammate comes over, all pleading like....
"ref, ref ref ref ref ref, he called him a f****** cheeky c***!"
........
I'm just going to assume he's not a defence lawyer....I just said
"so.....you agree that he swore at my AR? Thanks, I'll note that on my report" (and I did! - I figure that will help if he tries to claim I misheard him!)
 
I've told this story on here before, but it's relevant:

Ball is crossed in, headed into the goal but the offside flag goes up. Attacker, on the penalty spot, screams to the AR 'you f****** cheating c***!!!!'
Red card, no hesitation.
Teammate comes over, all pleading like....
"ref, ref ref ref ref ref, he called him a f****** cheeky c***!"
........
I'm just going to assume he's not a defence lawyer....I just said
"so.....you agree that he swore at my AR? Thanks, I'll note that on my report" (and I did! - I figure that will help if he tries to claim I misheard him!)


I would like to think both have the same end result, dont even need an explanation to be given to the players.


Throwing this out there, "ref your cheating us", is this exact same as "ref your a cheat?" ........
 
" you're 5hit"

Instant answer: "I know mate, that's why I get all the 5hit teams" :p

I'd have probably dished out a yellow, based on how his words did or didn't make me feel at the time, and within the context of the moment.

If no card, then I'd have fixed him with my thousand yarder and said "Insult me one more time and you'll walk!!". :)
 
"I'm reffing at the same level as you're playing mate and I've only just started". Used that several times but only in the right context, ie with a smile on your face and if the match hasn't been heated. Always good to have a joke and not tske yourself too seriously at low Sunday league level.

I made the mistake of saying how I played at a considerably higher level to players before when they've been having a go but that was plain stupid and a lesson learnt as you just invite more anger and division into the conversation so I put that one away very quickly. You live and learn.
 
I will have a laugh with players as and when, but nothing clever and sarcasm is completely out
 
My go to line when someone says I've made a mistake -'I'm only human and we all make mistakes, as showcased by your performance today'


I do something similar with approaching coaches.....along lines of

"do i stand in the middle of the pitch shouting what tactics you should be using or screaming at you that number 12 should be replacing number 7? No? Well, in return, dont tell me how to referee the game (please) "
 
I’m not with @Ciley on this. IMHO sarcasm and confrontational humour are a bad idea on the field. It is asking for escalation and trouble. In my experience, especially as teams get more serious, there are always players listening looking for anything they can use against you.

At low level a couple of times I offered 100 euro quid for each one of my mistakes if I could get 1 for each one of the players’... but only with guys already smiling.
 
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Its an aquired style and one I accept can back fire.
Bit old fashioned and very careful when to use it
I always let them start it, and consider that to be the tone they deem acceptable

The top flight games I been on,the experienced refs did it, again, sparingly

Def to be used with extreme caution or not at all
 
I think I had the full set thrown at me over the 12 years I was active, I grew from too soft to probably too severe..... BUT, once I'd gained my reputation it set a bar that teams knew they couldn't rise above... Games because nicer and better behaved as my reputation proceeded me. I'd often hear (jokingly).... 'Its that t**t again, don't over swear but 100% don't swear in his face.... He will send you off!!! Be warned!!
 
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