True Story...

[Kes]

David Beckham's son arrived for training.

"What number shirt am I?" he asked his coach.

His coach replied, "Wear four out there Romeo".

 

[Peter Grove]

I bought a pet rabbit for the kids last week.

It fed it the corner from my ham toastie on Sunday.
Then it ate a little bit of my cheese toastie on Monday.
Then a smidgeon of my mince toastie yesterday.

I found it dead today.


Mixo'mytoasties.

 

[one]

A man has been stealing wheels from police cars. Police has been working tirelessly to find him.

 

[Kes]

Our local pub is so rough.

They had a quiz on last night and the 1st question was, what the f*** you looking at?