No problem with a decision being questioned....providing it is done in the right way......"forcefully" will normally result in a caution....because "forcefully" normally involves a degree of attempted intimidation towards the referee in the forlorn hope that they will change their mind.
Your cards are a way to control players......don't be scared of using them.
Far too much is dismissed as "frustration" by referees who are too weak, too lazy or too indoctrinated to correctly identify it as dissent or OFFINABUS and actually do something about it.
Generally, ex players are some of the worst culprits.....because they did it themselves, therefore they mistakenly believe that it is acceptable and will find any excuse to call it "frustration" rather than just dealing with it properly.
In the end we're probably agreeing with each other. I would bet that my proportion of cards for dissent is high. In my last game I booked one for having a go at the assistant, another for a snarky comment after the half-time whistle and sent the manager off - 7.5 from the assessor for AoL and Match Control. I've also stopped the game more than once this season to caution and IDFK.
I guess my comment is really wrapped up in this strike business. Yes, genuine abuse is unacceptable, but the tone of that whole debate sometimes suggests that we shouldn't take any responsibility for ourselves. I mean that both in terms of using the tools that we already have available (as you say, not finding excuses), but also by accepting that it isn't a job for the thin-skinned. Another reason I can accept frustration is because I know I make mistakes!
And I brought up the rugby comparison just because it's a pet-hate of mine - if players became obedient man-babies then we really would lose something.