(Lack of) Respect

[RefJef]

It was a cr@p pitch, rubbish ball (too many too soft, not enough available to keep the game going each time one got hoofed into the neigbouring field or lost in a hedge, so lots of delays for restarts - cue complaints from the away team that I should sort it out(!)), poor players - blues won 'cos they had a player with a loooong throw and a few big men to get on the end of it, neither team could string more than 4 passes together, and I doubt one side retained possession for more than 30 seconds at any one time. And, quite probably, the ref wasn't much good, but I think he was possibly one of the least worst factors in the game.

The players I can cope with - most of the whinging & whining is through frustration and I have the tools (chat, cards etc.) to deal with that. No, what bugged me was the spectators, of both sides. Perhaps it was because the sun was shinning, the first afternoon to feel the warmth of the sun on your skin for some months, but I was surprised how many turned out to watch such a low level league match.

I gave a corner - 'cos that's what I thought it was, some players disagreed, who knows, maybe I was right, maybe I was wrong, but the players accepted it and we all got ready for the corner (for greens (away side)). As I was taking up my position a (green) supporter, inline with me, looking directly at me, told me to "F$ck 0ff". Blow the whistle to hold up play. Head over to home team manger to tell him what happened "He's an away supporter, nothing to do with me" (Home team manager was a bit of a wet blanket all afternoon) I think it is his responsibility (would be interested on opinions on this), but realise he 'aint going to do anything, so call green captain over, explain what has happened, tell him its not acceptable. To be fair green captain goes over, ******** him (he obviously knows him) and on the whole he's quiet for the rest of the game.

Midway into 2nd half, give a free kick to blues. Set the ball down, walk the wall back 10 yrds. Move to my position ready to blow, blues complain wall isn't back 10. I had my eyes on the wall the whole time, its not moved, blues may have moved ball forward - but I didn't see that, if they have they've penalised themselves as they are now closer to the wall. I blow the whistle and ball ends up in car park.

Goal kick duly taken, hoofed down the pitch, bounces off a few heads (& knees, and shins etc) before going off for a blue throw in their half, near their "fans." At which point I hear one bloke (not exactly sure who, but I think of pensionable age, certainly not some young hot head) say (again, so I could hear) "well, the ref can't even count 10 yards". To be fair, one of the green players rolled his eyes and said something along the lines of "that wasn't necessary" as I pointedly looked over to the home support with my best teacher stare. Throughout the game I kept hearing snide, questioning comments from this group of young women and old men.

As I say, players I can cope with, and deal with. But I am left thinking what right do those people (spectators) have to hurl insults and abuse at me, and then shirk back into the crowd. Cowards.

For the first time, I have today wondered why I bother (and I suspect many of our brethren receive far worse). The football was rubbish, the highlight a moment of mediocrity. If it was like this every week I'd pack it in. But its not - yesterday I had a great 2 and half hours officiating some U16 trial games for a local League 2 side, tomorrow I back at an U15 side were they (players & parents alike) are more than grateful to have a half competent ref. So, sorry for the whinge, but I wanted to get it off my chest.

Oh, and to cap it all, as I blew the final whistle I thought "right, shake hands with everyone, get your dosh, and go". But no, I then had to hang around whilst the home team manager (remember him?) collected in his players subs to get enough cash to pay me my well earned £25.

 

[Cheshire Ref]

@RefJef whilst I understand your frustrations I personally would completely ignore the idiots who feel the need to say anything, I really couldn't care less what they think of me. The higher up you go, the bigger the crowds so a higher percentage of idiots, to the point where the top guys have a few thousand singer the referee's a wa****r or you don't know what your doing. Can you imagine them stopping the game to speak to the home side to ask them to stop?

Other than pitch encroachment, inciting violence and racism/homophobia then they can say what they want. I would also step in if it was a junior game.

I am sure some will disagree.....

 

[JamesL]

I have to echo @Cheshire Ref here myself. I never involve myself with spectators unless any of the above named offences. Had they told an opposition player to F off would you have taken the same action? My guess is not.
We all have games like that where we think why the hell am i doing this? But when its all said and done we brush ourselves off and carry on and have better days all for the love of the game.

 

[RefJef]

Thanks for your comments.

Pleased to hear that you just "tune it out" because that's what I've always done/tried to do myself before.

But if we just take a moment to look at this out of context: a group of people gang up on an individual and harass and hurl insults at him. Is that OK? In most/any context I'd say not, but are we all a little bit complicit in saying its OK on a football pitch?

Remember, this was the bottom rung of the very long football ladder - I'm just some bloke who gives up his Saturday afternoon so another 22 blokes can huff & puff around a pitch. As ever, it seems a few are willing to blame all the woes of the pitch, the balls, the players on me, the man in the middle. @James Long I liked your quote in the offside thread: "At the end of the day its not our fault they are playing at a standard that doesnt require NARs." After a frustrating day like today, that is a good thought to take into tomorrow.

 

[Brian Hamilton]

A few thoughts and you're not going to like them...

Ball too soft? That is your problem. Get them pumped up before the game. If they are still too soft, make a show of telling both captains that they're too soft and explain that you'll be reporting it after the game. For now the ball is the same for both teams and let's get on with it.

Standard of football poor? But that's to be expected. You can't be refereeing on MotD every week. Service before self.

A speccy looked at you and swore at you when you are positioning for a corner? Where were you standing? All the positions I know for a corner kick wouldn't put me within 15 yards of a speccy and if I'm listening to or lip reading a speccy from that distance, then I'm not concentrating on the game. Green captain has helped you out. I hope you thanked him.

A speccy said you couldn't count 10 yards? Was he right about the distance? Were you so focussed on the wall that you forgot to watch the kicker moving the ball? Again that's down to you. Player has helped you out again too.

You stare at the speccys and they make snide comments that you hear all game? Stop listening to them. Stop looking at them. Concentrate on the game. If it really bothers you then go back to the manager and go up the steps. You ask him, then tell him to sort it out. If he refuses, you suspend the game until he sorts it out. If he still does nothing then abandon if it's affecting you so much. By doing nothing you condoned it. It was within your powers to deal with it and you haven't.

You had to wait to get paid after the game? What do your league rules say about payment? If they say the club should pay you before the game, then report them. If they say they can pay you after the game, then you just have to wait.

 

[RefJef]

Rejected the match ball beforehand re KO as it had a split in the leather. Was offered some other balls, which were flat, so I rejected them. Home team coach trots off to pump them up, returning with two, which I accepted. However, 5 mins in first ball hoofed into adjacent field. Call for replacement ball, 5 mins later it ends in a (big) hedge and is lost for the rest of the game. Original ball still in next door field. Spectator goes to collect it, attempts to kick it back to us, slices it into another field .... Rinse and repeat throughout the game, each time it happens you can see the temperature rising.

I accept that grassroots football has its own unique challenges, is run on a shoestring by well meaning volunteers, but the home team could have done more to mitigate the circumstances (like having a sub collecting the ball when it ends up in the next county) which would have reduced the frustration of all as we waited to restart.

Fully accept the point about standard of football, but if I'm to turn up week in, week out, there has to be something in it for me (it's not the money) and watching 22 blokes hoof it around whilst getting abuse from the sides (on the whole, the players were fine) is not it.

I'll chalk it up to experience, learn a lot from it, and hop back in the saddle tomorrow which I'm sure will be fine and dandy. But if every game was like today's, I'd find myself a new hobby.

 

[Mintyref]

A few thoughts and you're not going to like them...

Ball too soft? That is your problem. Get them pumped up before the game. If they are still too soft, make a show of telling both captains that they're too soft and explain that you'll be reporting it after the game. For now the ball is the same for both teams and let's get on with it.

Standard of football poor? But that's to be expected. You can't be refereeing on MotD every week. Service before self.

A speccy looked at you and swore at you when you are positioning for a corner? Where were you standing? All the positions I know for a corner kick wouldn't put me within 15 yards of a speccy and if I'm listening to or lip reading a speccy from that distance, then I'm not concentrating on the game. Green captain has helped you out. I hope you thanked him.

A speccy said you couldn't count 10 yards? Was he right about the distance? Were you so focussed on the wall that you forgot to watch the kicker moving the ball? Again that's down to you. Player has helped you out again too.

You stare at the speccys and they make snide comments that you hear all game? Stop listening to them. Stop looking at them. Concentrate on the game. If it really bothers you then go back to the manager and go up the steps. You ask him, then tell him to sort it out. If he refuses, you suspend the game until he sorts it out. If he still does nothing then abandon if it's affecting you so much. By doing nothing you condoned it. It was within your powers to deal with it and you haven't.

You had to wait to get paid after the game? What do your league rules say about payment? If they say the club should pay you before the game, then report them. If they say they can pay you after the game, then you just have to wait.

Harsh but fair.......

 

[GraemeS]

Every league I've ever refereed in has specified that the referee must be supplied with (at least) 2 suitable match balls. If lost balls and poor replacements are becoming a problem, I think you're entitled to read that as "2 suitable match balls available at all times" - including the "replacement spare" ball when the first gets lost.

I think my approach would be to have a word with the home team manager at half time and remind him that it's his responsibility to have a suitable spare ball to hand at all times - and that you'll be reporting the club if you have to stop play again because an unsuitable ball is thrown on. In reality it's probably no more than £20 or £30 fine - but he's not going to know that off the top of his head and it might mean he spends a little more time making sure every spare he has to hand is good enough.