The Ref Stop

1st match as a Category 7 Referee

GCS1982

New Member
So my 1st match as a referee was carried out at the weekend, the match was an U14 friendly, so therefore no team sheets or proper substitutions were taking place, subs rolling on & off with my discretion. The “away” team only had 10 players so had to borrow a goalkeeper from the “home” team, which changed positions about 5 times!
I arrived at the location a full 60 mins prior to a 11 am kick off, even though the match was to be played on an all-weather pitch I still wanted to check it out, as the temp was at the time -2, I also wanted to make sure I was ready in all aspects for the game. The home teams coach was already in attendance, so I collected the key to the referee’s changing room, the referee’s room can only be described as a broom cupboard with 2 washing machines in it, oh well not ideal, however there was enough room to get changed and use the washing machines as a table for my stuff.
I met my assessor, who informed me it wasn’t ideal that my 1st match was a friendly, the match itself went through pretty smoothly, I made 1 mistake during the 1st half where I gave a throw in to the Orange team, the Red teams coach showed his frustration and continued to protest that it was in fact a Red throw in, I made my decision and stuck with the Orange team, at this point I said to the coach, I am the ref and it’s my decision, I was met with a voice, probably one of the parents shouting, “shocking, shocking decision” it was only at half time when I spoke to my assessor, he said it was a red throw in, but it was good I stuck to my decision. He said I was doing ok, but had to take care on my positioning etc, and I was blowing the whistle to much!
2nd half started smoothly again, I only really had one thing to do, one player made a rash challenge, so I had a quick word with him and ordered a direct free kick. End of the match, I collected my flags spoke to my assessor, he said I missed a blatant offside, however nobody shouted from the side lines or on the pitch so everybody else didn’t notice it, I can already see from my 1st match that offsides are going to be difficult to notice. My assessor said I did a good job and to treat these games as a learning curve. One thing I did notice, at the full-time whistle not one player or coach shook my hand, I was always taught as a player if close to the referee, you should shake his hand to show respect. After I got changed and collected my match fee’s one of the coaches, said cheers for the game. So my 1st game went without any real glitches, however I would have like to carry out proper procedure for substitutions and team sheets but onto the next game, did I enjoy it the experience??, to be honest, nah not really!
 
The Ref Stop
If in your first game you got a throw and an offside wrong then you can be content
You seem very negative though, try focussing on what went right?
Nobody is going to get positioning to a t in one game
Small small steps, it takes a lot to go out there in the first place
Dont go looking for too much respect etc, as idealistic as it sounds
On the opposite to your helper, a friendly is ideal, so much less pressure and a great chance to start with the basics.
 
Sounds like it was the assessor/mentor who was the negative one!
The squabble that occurred over the throw-in...
I reckon all new refs get into frequent squabbles, with players, coaches, parents, outside agents, you name it. This will continue to happen for some time, until you figure out a way of swerving such coming together's. One liners, wit, blanking, running away, you name it; but one way or another squabbles are bad. As for handshakes all round and decent changing rooms, they're both as likely as one another!
 
Well done for getting through it.

Seems like it was different from what you expected. I felt, well yup, uncomfortable with the social/emotional side of refereeing for about the first 50 games. I used to fill in match reports and comment on the state of the nets and missing flags. It took me quite a few games to get some perspective.

With players and coaches, you have to earn their respect. It took me ages to get confident enough to be convincing (most of the time;)).

More games!
 
the match was an U14 friendly, so therefore no team sheets or proper substitutions were taking place, subs rolling on & off with my discretion.

My advice going forward is to ask for a team-sheet anyway, preferably with the person contacting you to referee the match. Helps so you have the names available and for later discipline reporting if it comes to it. Don't think you need to send the team-sheet in, but it's still ideal to have the record there. I know it's not standard practice, but its what I do anyway.

And do the subs properly, go over and manage it, even in friendlies. Good practice.

One thing I did notice, at the full-time whistle not one player or coach shook my hand, I was always taught as a player if close to the referee, you should shake his hand to show respect.

Wouldn't worry about it. Had a player swerve me even though I offered my hand last Sat. He came over once everyone had gone off and shook my hand once he had calmed down - he wasn't particularly happy with my "reluctance" to caution the opposition that day!

And some days you're going to get no handshakes and the only person singing your praises will be the assessor. So, yeah, don't worry too much about the handshakes.

I can already see from my 1st match that offsides are going to be difficult to notice.

Yeah, I hate it personally. I particularly hate teams playing offside traps when I'm on my own, sometimes you're never going to be in a position to see enough to be sure.

Only advice on that is get wide so you can look across for offside and hope every through ball goes straight to the keeper so you don't have to call it!

I used to fill in match reports and comment on the state of the nets and missing flags. It took me quite a few games to get some perspective

Haha, that's amazing. I give up on the comments section as there's sod all to be done in most cases. My changing room last weekend was a boiler room... No private shower either. Club has been around for ages, don't think my comments on it will change anything at this point!
 
I wouldn't worry about team sheets in an U14 game, in the 3 junior leagues I ref in, it is not the referees responsibility to check or obtain team sheets so I wouldn't complicate it. I've yet to have a changing room in junior football so a broom cupboard is a bonus! For throw ins did you not give a flag to each teams' coach to run the line? I tend to put the responsibility on them and only when it's obviously not what they've given do I over rule. If they call it wrong and you go with it, you can tel the players you're following the coaches call. If they don't raise the flag because they don't know or aren't watching and you're unsure, award it to the opposite team to theirs. They soon start to get it right. As for offsides, other than plainly obvious ones that you get right, you will get grief from defenders for not blowing and attackers for blowing, All part of the fun. Hopefully you will start to enjoy the experience, no point otherwise
 
I'll probably get shot down for this but for me, getting there an hour before a match when you're on your own is counter productive. Once you've checked the pitch over (bearing in mind if it's a grass pitch then there's every chance that the nets won't even be up when you get there or the flags out etc), then you're just going to be hanging about in the cold which will extend the feeling of being on your own for longer and lessen your enjoyment. 20-30 minutes is ample at grass roots.

Accept that alot of negative things will be said to you and you see alot of negative behaviour towards you as well. Its all frustration and sillyness and once you understand that you soon learn not to give a stuff about any of it. I just see the humour in it. That and I remember some of the things I said to refs and how hypocritical it would be for me to get annoyed with players now lol
 
I'll probably get shot down for this but for me, getting there an hour before a match when you're on your own is counter productive. Once you've checked the pitch over (bearing in mind if it's a grass pitch then there's every chance that the nets won't even be up when you get there or the flags out etc), then you're just going to be hanging about in the cold which will extend the feeling of being on your own for longer and lessen your enjoyment. 20-30 minutes is ample at grass roots.

Accept that alot of negative things will be said to you and you see alot of negative behaviour towards you as well. Its all frustration and sillyness and once you understand that you soon learn not to give a stuff about any of it. I just see the humour in it. That and I remember some of the things I said to refs and how hypocritical it would be for me to get annoyed with players now lol

Yeh understand your reasons, i took my time getting changed etc made sure I had everything as it was my 1st match. My next match will do team sheets, so I will need time to write my copy into my notebook. Carry out decent warm up, meet coaches. An hour is nothing really.
 
Well done for getting through it.

Seems like it was different from what you expected. I felt, well yup, uncomfortable with the social/emotional side of refereeing for about the first 50 games. I used to fill in match reports and comment on the state of the nets and missing flags. It took me quite a few games to get some perspective.

With players and coaches, you have to earn their respect. It took me ages to get confident enough to be convincing (most of the time;)).

More games!

yeh was a bit different to what i was expecting, maybe cos I was out of my comfort zone, More experience I get the more I think I will enjoy it.
 
Match 2 next..... you now have experiences to do stuff better!!! Good luck and well done for your honesty!! Its a great learning trait!!
 
If in your first game you got a throw and an offside wrong then you can be content
You seem very negative though, try focussing on what went right?
Nobody is going to get positioning to a t in one game
Small small steps, it takes a lot to go out there in the first place
Dont go looking for too much respect etc, as idealistic as it sounds
On the opposite to your helper, a friendly is ideal, so much less pressure and a great chance to start with the basics.

Thank you, yeh on reading my post it is quite negative, there can be alot of positives to take out of refereeing my 1st game, I have high expectations or high standards, I just have to remember I am starting at the bottom of the ladder & its U14's :-)
 
Well done for your first game. Sounds like you had a decent game and enjoying it is a bonus.

I always ask for a teamsheet, friendly or not. Even if it's only names and jersey numbers on a blank piece of paper. We have a "no teamsheet, no game" rule down here.

In regards to the referee's room, its not uncommon to use the referees room as the storage room. Or is it they use the storage room as the referees room. I get confused. :)

I suspect your "assessor" was in fact your mentor. You wont be formally assessed for a little while until you get some experience but kudos to your organisation for giving you a mentor for your first game. My RA has been doing that for the last three seasons.

After full time position yourself in or close to the centre circle and wait there for half a minute or so. This gives players and coaches a fair chance to come to you and shake hands, if they don't, don't lose any sleep over it. Of course if it has been a tough game, lots of dissent and shouts from the sideline, forget this advice and get out of there as soon as you can :)
 
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Well done for your first game. Sounds like you had a decent game and enjoying it is a bonus.

I always ask for a teamsheet, friendly or not. Even if it's only names and jersey numbers on a blank piece of paper. We have a "no teamsheet, no game" rule down here.

In regards to the referee's room, its not uncommon to use the referees room as the storage room. Or is it they use the storage room as the referees room. I get confused. :)

I suspect your "assessor" was in fact your mentor. You wont be formally assessed for a little while until you get some experience but kudos to your organisation for giving you a mentor for your first game. My RA has been doing that for the last three seasons.

After full time position yourself in or close to the centre circle and wait there for half a minute or so. This gives players and coaches a fair chance to come to you and shake hands, if they don't, don't lose any sleep over it. Of course if it has been a tough game, lots of dissent and shouts from the sideline, forget this advice and get out of there as soon as you can :)


Thanks for the info, will take that into the next game. Our RA always have a mentor / observer for your 1st game to qualify you to referee on your own. Eeeeek!
 
I’m sure all members here watch all games on TV through ref eyes... it’s different to supporting a team!
 
Don't hang up on hand shakes, if you do your job properly they may think you're a ****. Likewise, you may let them get away with murder and your the best ref they've seen!!

It can be a lonely place at times LOL!!!
 
Don't hang up on hand shakes, if you do your job properly they may think you're a ****. Likewise, you may let them get away with murder and your the best ref they've seen!!

It can be a lonely place at times LOL!!!

Nah not really hung up about it, just found it strange. but hey ho! i can imagine it being a lonely place :-)
 
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