I like to keep games on a tight leash until such time as there is strong evidence that a more liberal approach can be adopted.
the better I get at managing myself the more successful I seem to be.
Whilst we all like a level 90 minutes it is perfectly OK to change your approach if it gives you more control.
@RefRyanAus has given you a masterclass from which I have selected 3 quotes above. These are perfectly instructive and, I think, can help you tremendously maintain control.
In general, I use the following:
First ten minutes are strictly controlled. Advantages must be very clear and obvious for me to give them, otherwise it's a free kick. The first foul of the game, I "go big" by running to the spot, big whistle, big signal, and usually some form of verbal communication to the one who fouled. It's not for him, necessarily, so much as it is for everyone else to know that I'm here and in control of this game. After the ten minutes has elapsed, then I will allow play to continue, and I won't call every little foul I see if and only if the players are giving me evidence that they will remain calm.
Five minutes before half time, and five minutes after half time, I resume my strict control as above. Advantages are few and far between and smaller fouls are being called.
The last ten minutes of the game is the same.
In addition to this, after major flash points like goals, heavy challenges, red cards and even some yellow cards, I will reclaim control of the game as outlined above.
This may sound like it's going to create problems and make you look a bit of a jobsworth; but if you use your personality and stick to it, your game management will improve.
As a side note, game management and man management are separate considerations that will both need to be used. For game management, do as I have outlined above and make sure that when you feel the temperature of the game creep up, you increase your presence. For man management, look for a few key people on each team: the best player and the "character." With the best player, I like to (a) compliment him early on a good play so he knows that I'm watching and that I understand the game; with the "character" I like to get into his ear early with a joke or some banter and then take some from him and laugh at it so he knows that I'm a good'un. Once you have these two players, who are usually leaders whether they have the armband or not, on your side then the rest of the team will fall in line and this will help your overall game management really well.
One final thought is that protecting the best players on both teams by calling the early fouls against them will signal to the teams that you're in control and that you understand the teams and their play styles. This goes a long way toward creating good will for further down the line.
Think of game management like a bank account. If you've never seen a team, you don't start with nothing, but you don't start with much. Throughout the first ten minutes, you want to fill the account up as much as possible so that when the time comes for a big, match-impacting decision you have the funds to "afford it." You'll be surprised by how accepting players can be of a massive KMI going against them if they trust you to make the right decision. There may be a short, emotional outburst but there will be nothing lingering to carry on.
