Long term lurker, first time poster.
For context; I've been refereeing for about 3 years and started to do u18 and u21 games in January having previously only doing u17 and below. I also coach an u15 team, so I'm know my way around grassroots football. I'm also a late starter to refereeing at 47 years young.
u21 cup game - home team are a mid table 2nd div u18 side of a club pretty notorious for poor conduct. Away team are a top u21 side - 3rd in the top div and only lost once this season. The pitch is poor but playable - I had reffed the u16s beforehand and it hadn't deteriorated too much so there was no question of postponement.
Game starts with not much quality and lots of niggly fouls. 10 mins in and a scuffle breaks out between two opposing players after a 5050 challenge, no punches were thrown but both players had each other by the scruff of the neck. I pull both players in and caution them for AA (I didn't call in the captains and I now realise this was my error as I had told them I would in the pre game talk). 5 mins later I award a foul against the home team, and a home player passes me and says loudly "That's b*******s you f*****g t**t!'. I pull him in and have the book in my hand with the intention of sending him for a sin bin, when I realise that it's the same player I had just cautioned. Regardless I then follow through and show a 2nd yellow for dissent followed by a red (I know this should be a straight red for OFFINABUS so I did bottle it to some extent). The player leaves the field protesting that the comment wasn't aimed at me but I certainly interpreted it that way, and even his own captain said that he also thought it was aimed at me.
Shortly after this I start to hear verbal threats from the sidelines but I couldn't make out who they were coming from or directed at. I definitely heard the home coach promise to kick someone's teeth in.
Game goes on, away team well on top with a man advantage but only 1-0 up approaching half time. Home team on a rare attack, ball goes out by corner flag, I can't tell who took the last touch and both players appeal, so I play safe and give a goal kick. Home manager is right by the incident and loudly disagrees - cue exaggerated appeals from home players. The right back follows me to the halfway line and gets uncomfortably close as he continues to protest so I send him for a sin bin. The levels of dissent from the home team were way beyond anything I had encountered before and the player in question was way out of order - I didn't feel that I could maintain authority without using official sanctions. It didn't sit well with me though as they were now playing up an age group 9v11, against a clearly superior side.
At this point a spectator begins shouting loud threats clearly directed at me and I decide that the game has become unsafe, so I go to the halfway line between the groups of coaches and call them in. The home coach doesn't come over he sends someone else, who I tell that I will abandon the game unless the spectator issuing threats is removed, and the verbal abuse between the coaches stops immediately. He says this might be difficult, but I tell him that either he goes or I go and he agrees. The away coach asks how long is left and with just 90 secs of the half remaining I agree to blow for ht so that things can settle down. The spectator then promises to be waiting for me after the game.
So I go to wait for 2nd half kick off - hammering down with rain, pitch awful after 45 mins of men churning it up. That half time was my loneliest 10 mins as a referee - I felt that I had lost control and I played it over and over in my mind.
Thankfully the 2nd half was a breeze by comparison - away team used their numerical advantage, wore them down and ran out 6-0 winners. All players shook my hand at the end, captain said he had no complaints. Home coaches amicable but obviously not happy - felt that I didn't protect their younger side, missed a lot of pushes and a few late ones.
I think I'm sharing this because it's the first incident which has genuinely rattled me as a ref, and I'd just like to know what I did wrong and what I can improve on.
Cheers
p.s he wasn't waiting for me.
For context; I've been refereeing for about 3 years and started to do u18 and u21 games in January having previously only doing u17 and below. I also coach an u15 team, so I'm know my way around grassroots football. I'm also a late starter to refereeing at 47 years young.
u21 cup game - home team are a mid table 2nd div u18 side of a club pretty notorious for poor conduct. Away team are a top u21 side - 3rd in the top div and only lost once this season. The pitch is poor but playable - I had reffed the u16s beforehand and it hadn't deteriorated too much so there was no question of postponement.
Game starts with not much quality and lots of niggly fouls. 10 mins in and a scuffle breaks out between two opposing players after a 5050 challenge, no punches were thrown but both players had each other by the scruff of the neck. I pull both players in and caution them for AA (I didn't call in the captains and I now realise this was my error as I had told them I would in the pre game talk). 5 mins later I award a foul against the home team, and a home player passes me and says loudly "That's b*******s you f*****g t**t!'. I pull him in and have the book in my hand with the intention of sending him for a sin bin, when I realise that it's the same player I had just cautioned. Regardless I then follow through and show a 2nd yellow for dissent followed by a red (I know this should be a straight red for OFFINABUS so I did bottle it to some extent). The player leaves the field protesting that the comment wasn't aimed at me but I certainly interpreted it that way, and even his own captain said that he also thought it was aimed at me.
Shortly after this I start to hear verbal threats from the sidelines but I couldn't make out who they were coming from or directed at. I definitely heard the home coach promise to kick someone's teeth in.
Game goes on, away team well on top with a man advantage but only 1-0 up approaching half time. Home team on a rare attack, ball goes out by corner flag, I can't tell who took the last touch and both players appeal, so I play safe and give a goal kick. Home manager is right by the incident and loudly disagrees - cue exaggerated appeals from home players. The right back follows me to the halfway line and gets uncomfortably close as he continues to protest so I send him for a sin bin. The levels of dissent from the home team were way beyond anything I had encountered before and the player in question was way out of order - I didn't feel that I could maintain authority without using official sanctions. It didn't sit well with me though as they were now playing up an age group 9v11, against a clearly superior side.
At this point a spectator begins shouting loud threats clearly directed at me and I decide that the game has become unsafe, so I go to the halfway line between the groups of coaches and call them in. The home coach doesn't come over he sends someone else, who I tell that I will abandon the game unless the spectator issuing threats is removed, and the verbal abuse between the coaches stops immediately. He says this might be difficult, but I tell him that either he goes or I go and he agrees. The away coach asks how long is left and with just 90 secs of the half remaining I agree to blow for ht so that things can settle down. The spectator then promises to be waiting for me after the game.
So I go to wait for 2nd half kick off - hammering down with rain, pitch awful after 45 mins of men churning it up. That half time was my loneliest 10 mins as a referee - I felt that I had lost control and I played it over and over in my mind.
Thankfully the 2nd half was a breeze by comparison - away team used their numerical advantage, wore them down and ran out 6-0 winners. All players shook my hand at the end, captain said he had no complaints. Home coaches amicable but obviously not happy - felt that I didn't protect their younger side, missed a lot of pushes and a few late ones.
I think I'm sharing this because it's the first incident which has genuinely rattled me as a ref, and I'd just like to know what I did wrong and what I can improve on.
Cheers
p.s he wasn't waiting for me.
