A&H

Junior/Youth CAR and player having a spat

DaveMac

DaveMac

RefChat Addict
Level 7 Referee
Under 14 this weekend green v blue, a massively one sided cup game. Blue have a corner tsken by their captain and the green CAR is clearly having words with him. I keep an eye on it to see if anything happens. It doesn't and the corner comes in and goes for a goal kick. Blues captain who took the corner as he's running back tells me to keep an eye out as "apparently I called th lineo a kn0bhead", which the captain said he didn't. I tell him to get on with it and I'll keep my eyes open.

Come half time the CAR comes over and tells me to keep an eye on the blues captain and he's called him a kn0bhead. Obviously I was fully expecting this conversation. The CAR said he told the captain to calm down and was just verbally abused. Now normally I will do my best to defend a CAR and protect them as they are doing their bit by helping out, no matter how bad they are. But what annoyed me is the whole time he was talking to me he is checking something on his mobile and paying little to no attention to his conversation with me. Also I couldn't help but think why on earth is a grown man getting into any verbals with a boy of 13. Kids at that age can have a short fuse, and not often I'll defend players, but they shouldn't have to put up with people like provoking them. I told the CAR just to steer clear of it as it's not worth getting involved, and they are just a bunch of kids.

I just can't for th life of me work out why grown adults get involved in things like this.
 
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I can't believe you are saying that about a CAR. He is part of your team. I often act as CAR for my son's team and if I was spoken to like that by a 14 year old I would expect the referee to do something about it, not defend the player !
 
In General life kids should not be talking to Adults in that way!!!

A modern cultural problem I fear

40 years ago ,if a 13 year old spoke to an Adult like that he would firstly expect a kick up the arse from the Adult, Marched over to his old man who would then give him another for his cheek !!!:)

How times have changed !:mad:
 
I stepped in between two 15 year old players after levering them apart a couple of weeks ago who were just about to start fighting each other. The father of one of them (the one who had started all the trouble) then wanted to fight me in the car park for man-handling his son :-(
 
Duncan Francis said:
I stepped in between two 15 year old players after levering them apart a couple of weeks ago who were just about to start fighting each other. The father of one of them (the one who had started all the trouble) then wanted to fight me in the car park for man-handling his son :-(
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I wouldn't get between fighting players (starting to or otherwise). To me it's too risky to put yourself in that position (youth or otherwise). Use the whistle to get their attention, ask the respective captains to separate and issue the red cards once they've finished.
Write the misconduct report and let the FA deal with it. If you lay a hand on a player, you're giving them grounds to contest and is that worth the hassle?
 
David Sutton said:
I wouldn't get between fighting players (starting to or otherwise). To me it's too risky to put yourself in that position (youth or otherwise). Use the whistle to get their attention, ask the respective captains to separate and issue the red cards once they've finished.
Write the misconduct report and let the FA deal with it. If you lay a hand on a player, you're giving them grounds to contest and is that worth the hassle?
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Agreed, normally the other players will seperate them. juniors can be more problematic (see DF's issue) so leave them as well. Parents, officials etc will seperate them.

Twenty years ago, yes seperate if you were big enough (I am over 6 foot) and coudl do it. Nowadays, just stand back and make notes.
 
We had this discussion about getting between players fairly recently.
 
"I didn't know it was the ref. I just lashed out at someone who was grabbing hold of me. I was acting in self defence."
 
I wasn't the ref, I was acting as CAR as one of the Dad's. I would never step in between OA players who were fighting !
 
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