A&H

complimenting players

J

Jake Northwood

New Member
Level 7 Referee
I reffed my first 'non school' game tonight, it was an 11 aside midweek league which has 25 minute halves so I've got in at the shallow end..

My first question of I'm sure many, Is does anybody compliment a player on a nice piece of play? I found myself saying things like "great save keeper, that's a corner ball lads" and " good effort player that was unlucky". That sort of thing.

Is it allowed and does it effect match control?
Does anybody Else do it?
I thought after it may result in trouble if I'm not consistent with it. " ref how come you said it the the blues and not the reds" etc etc.
 
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Jake Northwood said:
I reffed my first 'non school' game tonight, it was an 11 aside midweek league which has 25 minute halves so I've got in at the shallow end..

My first question of I'm sure many, Is does anybody compliment a player on a nice piece of play? I found myself saying things like "great save keeper, that's a corner ball lads" and " good effort player that was unlucky". That sort of thing.

Is it allowed and does it effect match control?
Does anybody Else do it?
I thought after it may result in trouble if I'm not consistent with it. " ref how come you said it the the blues and not the reds" etc etc.
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Hiya Jake,
At younger ages I like to compliment players on good play as I believe it is good encouragement for the kids and can also help your match control. However, if you are going to compliment players, make sure you do it to both teams other wise it could be seen as your being bias to them and this could hinder your match control. As I ref older ages eg u12 upwards i tend not to compliment the players as they are old enough to realise when they've done something good and they don't need the encouragement as much however it is still important to be vocal and communicate with players.
 
You are absolutely allowed to do it!

For me, it aids match control, in that it shows you're genuinely interested in the game. Nothing too extreme, but I'll regularly say things like "great save keeper"/"nice touch" etc. As long as you're not just complimenting one team or one particular player all the time, I really don't see a problem with it.
 
I used to do it quite a bit when reffing local Saturday/Sunday football, because it is a useful tool to integrate yourself into the game if used properly. However, having climbed a couple of levels, I don't do it now because I've found that players simply aren't interested in that kind of thing at Supply level. Other Level 4s might still be able to use it successfully, I've found it doesn't work for the level of football I'm now at. I usually save praise until the end of the game now to be honest.

The key thing is, if it works for you, then great; if it doesn't, don't do it and don't worry that it isn't right for you. What one referee can say/do, another just can't.
 
Yep, it's OK as long as you're fair, and absolutely encouraged if it helps "sell" a decision - complimenting a keeper on a good save can be a good way to diffuse the tension if he's claiming he didn't get a touch for example.

I tend to try and remember some of the best moments so that I can compliment the relevant players at HT or FT - it doesn't help you on the day, but it helps the players remember your face for the next time you turn up.
 
as a football fan and a referee I don't see the problem in telling someone that he took his goal well or well done keeper etc - no harm at all in doing this
 
GraemeS said:
Yep, it's OK as long as you're fair, and absolutely encouraged if it helps "sell" a decision -
.
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In this case "Great challenge" is also a winner.

Don't do it all the time however or you run the risk of becoming a commentator, and that does wind some managers up as they feel you favouring the other side, irrespective
 
"Good tackle, play on" and "good save, corner restart" can accompany appropriate signals.
Players are clear on what your observation and hence the basis of your decision is.
Even if they disagree that it was correct, they're less likely to argue when they have to use more than "nuh-uh!".
 
I use as a way of deflecting verbals at times when it is not obvious which team should have a restart - for example great touch keeper, corner ball or nice challenge red corner ball

You can see they are about to claim for the restart, but the compliment just deflates them and they get on with it. Works nicely.
 
I too always find myself with the 'good tackle, great tackle'

my favourite is also 'good jump guys' when challenging in the air, stops the 'in the back ref' shouts!
 
On challenges that are fair, but have the potential appearance of not being so, I'll use "good challenge", "clean challenge", etc a lot. I don't view it as a "compliment", but rather as a way to communicate (and hopefully diffuse blowups) with the players to let them know that a) I've seen it, and b) I've made a clear decision on it.

In terms of the compliments, limit them. Some of the suggestions above (ie, "great save, corner kick") are good ones. You're supposed to be unbiased and a step back from things, so if you praise plays here, there, and everywhere, you start to bring yourself in for a bit of potential stick.

The best way to handle compliments? A quiet word with the player in question. Don't yell across the field "fantastic shot to the upper 90, amazing goal!", but rather a quiet word when preparing for the kick off such as "nice strike on that goal".
 
Complimenting them on a good tackle is also a good one to go with, shows you're not just looking for a reason to use your whistle and that you appreciate the game.

Also, and this depends on the game and the player, but having a laugh with team mates when someone does something bad (for example miss an open goal) is great because again it shows you're human and not a robot.
 
Darius said:
Complimenting them on a good tackle is also a good one to go with, shows you're not just looking for a reason to use your whistle and that you appreciate the game.

Also, and this depends on the game and the player, but having a laugh with team mates when someone does something bad (for example miss an open goal) is great because again it shows you're human and not a robot.
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I literally came on here to post the exact same thing... Gotta gauge it though, some will have a laugh with you and some will do the old "You can't say that to me!" which is ironic when if it comes from a player doing the same to you... I've turned to players a fair few times and gone "Cracking cross that" etc. after a shot and had a laugh about it but you know the ones where you can have a laugh.
 
You build a rapport with certain players pretty quick and when you come to ref them again they'll remember you

It's worth noting that the teams where I know players who can have a laugh and I can have a laugh with, are the teams who tend to show the least dissent.

It's all about picking the right player at the right time

It is a great management tool if used correctly
 
Victim of my own success in this, was asked by a defender once (referring to the time left of course) "what does it say on your watch ref?"
I glanced at my watch and said "stop,start and reset" It took a while for the laughter to stop and he said to me "i asked for that didn't i"
 
I really used this thread in my first few games of the season. It has worked very well so far. With different age groups (u14 boys, u18 girls, men, 35+ men). I've given a handful of low key compliments in each game. Where it has really worked has been with a tetchy/frustrated flair player or captain. A quick "great effort" or "good shot" has worked a couple of times with players who seemed to be on the edge. It has perhaps shown they are appreciated and shut them up!

(touch wood of course)
 
santa sangria said:
I really used this thread in my first few games of the season. It has worked very well so far. With different age groups (u14 boys, u18 girls, men, 35+ men). I've given a handful of low key compliments in each game. Where it has really worked has been with a tetchy/frustrated flair player or captain. A quick "great effort" or "good shot" has worked a couple of times with players who seemed to be on the edge. It has perhaps shown they are appreciated and shut them up!

(touch wood of course)
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think you still need to be quite selective in who/how/when to dish out compliments. like you i try to take the edge off a players mood if they look like they are getting frustrated, and i one particular game i remarked on what i thought was an incredibly well timed tackle, having previously given free kicks against this player for some not so well timed ones. his response was a rather tetchy, " first thing youve got right all game" so i left it there as anything else could have been seen as me fishing for a YC reaction.... like anything else its all about timing i suppose
 
Just be careful that on a losing team someone might take it that you are being favourable or pally with the winning team (just because the losing team have had no decent shots, tackles etc).

Can be good when you get a "that's our ref" can be followed with a "correct it is " or if you've disagreed on a decision earlier "well glad we both agree on that" or on the other side "what, can you see THROUGH me or something?"

Sometimes thoguh we have the best seat in the ouse for some shots / saves / tackles etc and it is a pleasure to be there.
 
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