A&H

My First Game

B

Bennn

New Member
Level 7 Referee
This is my first post about my first game...

I'm 17 and I was reffing a U18s game difficult for my first I know, but I took it on being only a friendly...
Started the game off correctly etc....
Tried to let the game flow, few shouts at my decisions first half but no real moaning and I was happy, didn't give a penalty at one incident as he ran into the box kicked the ball past the player got clipped but there's no way he was getting the ball and he was falling over before contact...
Here's where it gets tricky...
Second Half starts the other team have 11 players the home team has 23 so the away team started messing around.. I gave a peno for a clear trip. But then two players started using handbags I was right there blew my whistle stopped play and stood back for the words to stop... But they both threw a punch at one another neither really connecting...
They both walked away, I spoke to both of them separately...then brought them together they shook hands, but I felt maybe I should have booked them both... It was only a friendly in a league game I would have sent them both off, but if I did that it would have been 10v11 and ruined the game for the 30 mins that was left..
A few harder challenges then followed but I started blowing them up so they were calming...
I felt I defused the situation well but not sure if I should have booked them, any comments?
 
The Referee Store
I think you probably should have sent them off, sending them off would leave them 10 v 10 and still fair despite the extra substitutes. Violent conduct like that is not something that should be let off as it can lead to more later in the game (even if it is a friendly) you may have got lucky that nothing major happened but you brought those harder challenges into the game they could have been eliminated by using the red.
 
Well done @Bennn for doing your first game

Good on you for reflecting on it and coming on here for feedback

Yep - as @Jacob Walukiewicz says above - there are lots of reasons to send off people that fight / throw punches - one of the main reasons is that is a preventive tool - you allow it once - something even worse could follow

Take lots of confidence from your FIRST game - keep learning - and go again next time :)
 
There are some things that you can "manage" in a friendly, such as cautions for fouls, delaying the restart, etc. Can also sometimes use it as an education approach by quietly telling them they'd be getting a caution for that in a competitive game.

But once a player crosses the line that leeway goes, and if it is a clear case of VC you still need to send him off, friendly or not.
 
Yeah, I think Rusty's right - judging how lenient to be in friendlies is very tricky and the best rule is: if in doubt, don't be lenient at all.

Giving a card where a card is deserved is never going to be a bad plan, wheras being lenient to one player and then being forced to clamp down 10 minutes will feel unfair to the players and damage your credibility.

Above all else, I hope you enjoyed the experience generally and well done on getting through it and coming on here for feedback - all of us look back on things in our first few matches that shape your refereeing style for years after.
 
Thanks all,
Yeah i defiantly should have got my cards out, i did defuse the situation and the players did seem to listen to me and they shook hands. Being a friendly i struggled to find a level of foul i should give. Because there were so many tackles if i give the one i felt i would be blowing up every minute. The next time i ever see any punch in the future i will be defiantly going for the red card. Hopefully my next game is soon :)
 
If it's a foul...it's a foul....forget all this 'friendly' nonsense and trying to adjust your performance to suit.

It's a pre season game.....its just a league game played without points being awarded.......approach it the same as you would any other competitive fixture.

If it needs a card it gets a card......
 
Well done Benn. Seems like you had a good game and that you enjoyed it. I hope all your matches are just as enjoyable. Lessons are there in every game to be learned, this was an important one, good to learn it in a friendly where nothing worse kicked off.
 
Friendly or league games should not make a difference, if players "get away" with things in a friendly they will think they can get away with it in a league game.
If you send players off and its a 11v8 game so be it,this will then make the players realise the consequences of their actions.
As for the comment " It was only a friendly in a league game I would have sent them both off, but if I did that it would have been 10v11 and ruined the game for the 30 mins that was left"
The two players you should have given the RC "ruined" the game for getting sent off.
As i stated in a previous post, i refereed a tournament last month where an U10 player got fouled jumped up and took a swing at the offender, his fist was a mere inch or so from his face, and even tried to punch him again when he missed.... regardless of his age,whether it spoilt his tournament or upset him/his parents(he was crying when he realised what was going to happen) i showed him the red card and sent him off, and as this happened just in front of his parents and they had a clear view of it i didn't get any complaints from them. Hopefully when he plays in another match he realises what will happen if he tries to punch another player.
 
A red card is a red card. You may tend to be a little more lenient in a friendly but numbers should not make a difference. It's a good way too to show authority. By showing a red card, you are effectively saying 'I am not taking any of this'. Well done on your first game though and it being at that age group.
 
Will Triffitt said:
A red card is a red card. You may tend to be a little more lenient in a friendly but numbers should not make a difference. It's a good way too to show authority. By showing a red card, you are effectively saying 'I am not taking any of this'. Well done on your first game though and it being at that age group.
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For me personally i would not be lenient in a friendly, what if in another game you referee one or both teams again what situation would you be in if you have to RC/YC a player for the same offence you were lenient on in the friendly match.
 
mikedn said:
For me personally i would not be lenient in a friendly, what if in another game you referee one or both teams again what situation would you be in if you have to RC/YC a player for the same offence you were lenient on in the friendly match.
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Personally I think players are generally intelligent enough to understand the difference between a competitive game and a friendly. So another alternative is simply to mention in passing to the player concerned that he would have been carded for the challenge / dissent etc had it been a competitive game. Best of both worlds :)
 
Russell Jones said:
Personally I think players are generally intelligent enough to understand the difference between a competitive game and a friendly. So another alternative is simply to mention in passing to the player concerned that he have been carded for the challenge / dissent etc had it been a competitive game. Best of both worlds :)[/QUOte
mmmmmm, we also generally think that players understand the basic laws of football, but they don't....
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Russell Jones said:
Personally I think players are generally intelligent enough to understand the difference between a competitive game and a friendly. So another alternative is simply to mention in passing to the player concerned that he would have been carded for the challenge / dissent etc had it been a competitive game. Best of both worlds :)
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Schoolboy error......;)
 
mikedn said:
For me personally i would not be lenient in a friendly, what if in another game you referee one or both teams again what situation would you be in if you have to RC/YC a player for the same offence you were lenient on in the friendly match.
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I'm not saying that I would let a lot go and not use disciplinary actions where necessary, I might just be not as strict as in a competitive game.
 
Will Triffitt said:
I'm not saying that I would let a lot go and not use disciplinary actions where necessary, I might just be not as strict as in a competitive game.
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Why should you not be so strict? The laws of the game should be applied regardless of the friendly/competitive game, otherwise there is no consistency, and we then go down the dreaded road of "last weeks ref"
 
I'm afraid I don't believe it when I hear referees say they referee friendlies, or non competition games if we want to be accurate, exactly the same way they would a competitive game.
 
RustyRef said:
I'm afraid I don't believe it when I hear referees say they referee friendlies, or non competition games if we want to be accurate, exactly the same way they would a competitive game.
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And why would you think that ? ......
 
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