A&H

Poor game

Xavier

Xavier

Member
Hi,
I was refereeing a u12 game today. Normally I have good games and I feel Ive done well with my decision. Today I noticed I was not thinking as quick and my decision making wasn't great probably due to the late night I had becoase of watching the football. It all got abit much when a parent started shouting from the touchline that they are playing against 12 men then the same parent started shouting across the pitch to the linesmen about a offside that was clearly offside. The game ended 2-1 but the loosing team were the better side and I and one of the goals of the winning teams goals came from a free kick which looking back probably wasn't. This was by far the worst game of the season
 
The Referee Store
Josh the referee said:
Learn from your mistakes then move on to the next game.

That's how I would look at it
Click to expand...
I look at it slightly differently ;)

Reflect on why you felt performance levels were low... I think based on what is written you have identified that preparation for the game i.e. a late night was not optimum. So how will you avoid that in future?

Then, once we have reflected, set out action we can move on to our next game to implement our development.
 
JamesL said:
I look at it slightly differently ;)

Reflect on why you felt performance levels were low... I think based on what is written you have identified that preparation for the game i.e. a late night was not optimum. So how will you avoid that in future?

Then, once we have reflected, set out action we can move on to our next game to implement our development.
Click to expand...
How would you deal with a parent that is constantly commenting your decision and saying things like "we are playing against 12 men"?
 
I find that I don't hear those comments because I'm focused or can laugh them off.

But if it does keep happening, then speak to the Home Team Manager (or Respect Steward depending on your area) and ask to have them removed from the ground.

Don't know if anyone else on here would do things differently at youth level?
 
Josh the referee said:
I find that I don't hear those comments because I'm focused or can laugh them off.

But if it does keep happening, then speak to the Home Team Manager (or Respect Steward depending on your area) and ask to have them removed from the ground.

Don't know if anyone else on here would do things differently at youth level?
Click to expand...
Today I tried to ignore these comments but maybe I should stand up for myself next time. Im 15 would you talk straight to the parent to calm down?
 
U12s are lucky to have a ref at all. Parents like that make me really angry. I don't care if it's the worst refereeing performance you've ever seen unless you're prepared to do it yourself shut up or **** off.

Do you have matchday delegates on your matches (ie. parents whose responsibility it is to keep other parents in line?) That would be my first port of call.
 
Xavier said:
How would you deal with a parent that is constantly commenting your decision and saying things like "we are playing against 12 men"?
Click to expand...

If its clear and obvious Mr Mouth is getting in your wick, quick run past coach..

" see man in blue hat, he drawing attention to himself, can you deal before i do.."

hopefully coach deals, or , mouthy realises and screws nut


if it continues, and its really a problem, first chance when ball dead etc, hold things up, and take control
 
Anubis said:
If its clear and obvious Mr Mouth is getting in your wick, quick run past coach..

" see man in blue hat, he drawing attention to himself, can you deal before i do.."

hopefully coach deals, or , mouthy realises and screws nut


if it continues, and its really a problem, first chance when ball dead etc, hold things up, and take control
Click to expand...
To be clear, in England, you should never deal directly with a spectator. It is the HOME clubs responsibility to deal with any spectator issues.
You have no power over a spectator. The club might not either.
But if it's at an unacceptable level then and the home club won't or can't deal with the problem then you pack up your kit and go home.
You should always report any problems and what was done to attempt to resolve as an extraordinary misconduct.

Edit: also to be clear abandoning is last resort.
 
Last edited:
Leagues are desperate to keep referees, it might be worth asking them if there's a mechanism for reporting badly behaved parents to them.
 
When I first started refereeing I found it really hard not to challenge parents/ supporters on comments. Especially being a teacher (if a parent was to do that in a school game I would ask them to leave immediately even if I was refereeing).

From experience now I have learnt that ignoring is the best way. By ignoring I mean not replying to the spectator and if it was anything like the example that you have just given I would definitely follow the advice of the others and be having a word with the manager. Stop the game if necessary. Something along the lines of ‘if that chap over there says one more word we won’t be continuing until he leaves and that will be your responsibility, not mine.

I feel that stopping the game, even momentarily, is very powerful especially at youth level as the majority of people want to see their son /daughter play in a game of football without abusing anyone.

Well done anyway, it sounded like it was a tough game to manage.
 
Never, ever, confront a spectator or parent. That would be like Michael Oliver confronting an abusive supporter at Old Trafford, it isn't likely to end well.

If you detect a parent being abusive towards you speak to the home coaches and ask them to have a word. If they won't / don't, or they do but it carries on, suspend the game and make it very clear it won't be restarting until the offending parent has been removed from within viewing distance of the pitch. Then report it after.

I would also recommend that you ask the coaches to make sure you leave the ground safely after the game. Thankfully fairly rare, but it isn't unheard of for parents who have got in trouble to confront and even assault the referee after the game
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top