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What is wrong with people?

DB

DB

Referee, Observer, Mentor, Player
Level 5 Referee
Sunday Cup quarter final fixture today. A few comments and petulance during the first half but nothing major; I get the captains together at half time to have a quick chat about language and that I'd like for them to stop trying to ref the game... Uneventful first 20 minutes of the second half and I almost began to think that what I said to the captains had worked.. Roll up number 16 to ruin the day!

Ball comes over the top from defence of away team, contested equally on the edge of the box and lands in the keepers arms. A few "foul refffffff"'s echoed around the field, to which I ignored and waved away. As I began to move to the halfway line for the goalies kick, I then heard "you're a bloody cheat" come from the centre circle, I turn to find just one player....

I blow the whistle, call the player over and pull out the yellow card. I note his shirt number and 66 from the watch onto my yellow card, I then ask for his name. "I didn't call you a cheat"... Didn't expect that response at all :hmmm: I ask again for his name, to which he then replies "you can suck my balls"...

At this time, in my head I'm thinking "Am I seriously hearing this right"? No need to question myself though as the player repeats the same line. He sees me pull the red from my top pocket, he turns away and walks towards the dugout. With no name still, I call the captain over and he doesn't know his name (yeah yeah, he seemed as if he was thinking about using someone else's). So, then I ask the manager who was on the field at the time (playing) to join me. As he walks to me, a quiet interchange of words with the captain (agreeing a name I suspect) and he then joins me. I get a name out of him, explained what had happened and he was a bit annoyed. His team were now 3-0 down, 24 minutes to play and now down to ten men!!

It was only on Boxing Day I sent one player off for hitting the cards out of my hand (caution first for a rubbish tackle, to which he again wouldn't give me his name), with his mate then approaching me calling me a "c**t" over and over again.

I don't get it with these lads. I've never been like that as a player, if you're gonna get cautioned, just accept it and learn from it, don't be an idiot and do what these guys did. My gosh!!!

After this game, I officiated a women's league game, they made the teams I'd just reffed look stupid!! Men could learn a thing or two! Not a bad standard either, some class goals among the 10 scored!
 
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Man alive, sounds like you had to deal with some idiots right there.

Coupes of things though; being called a cheat is a straight red all day long. This is a heinous crime in the refereeing world. Sent off players go to the changing room not the dug out, which he may have done as he walked past dugouts of course. If I don't get a name and the player walks off saying suck my balls then that is what gets reported - let the team explain to the CFA that they don't have a player called suck my balls.
 
I was going to caution for calling me a cheat. Personally, I didn't appreciate it but I wasn't particularly offended, water off a ducks back I suppose. I've not been called that before when reffing so it was quite strange territory.

I had a call from my ref. sec. after the game (he's also in my RA society) who said that just for calling me a cheat, he should have walked. Lesson learnt there.

The player went and sat in the dugout whilst I was talking to the manager. Before restarting play, I look over to the dugout and see the player sat there. I then (so not to make an already hostile relationship even worse) ask the manager to get him to leave the vicinity, which he does with his tail between his legs.

A moment of madness it seems as I was told this was his first red and he's usually got a good discipline record. Completely irrelevant though, I have a high tolerance level but this was just ridiculous.
 
Sounds like you handled it well mate. Well done Dave. :)

The stupidity of some players never fails to amaze me.

If more referees were more robotic, there'd be a lot less players left on the field after 90 minutes...... ;)
 
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It's all a learning curve mate, I like to try and take a firm, but fair approach but obviously be stern when I need to be.

I just don't get people. Why do it? Not once have I ever done anything like that (you're talking to a guy that has only ever had two yellow cards). I've always understood that a ref is in a position of authority and that he/she should be respected. i just don't get what goes through these guys heads when this is happening, surely they know that by continuing with the abuse is only going to end one way? It's frustrating because I then have to watch 10 lads battle it out for 20 odd minutes against a very technical, well balanced and dangerous team. Frustrating
 
Yellow card for 'cheat'?

Really?

Well, the search is over chaps.....we've just found the ultimate LWR!

On what planet can calling a match official ever be a caution?

Shouldn't even be a learning point......any referee that doesn't instinctively reach for red when called a cheat need to take up crocheting or something similarly harmless.

:confused:
 
Didn't expect that response from you @Padfoot .... I won't bite :)

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Padfoot said:
Yellow card for 'cheat'?

Really?

Well, the search is over chaps.....we've just found the ultimate LWR!

On what planet can calling a match official ever be a caution?

Shouldn't even be a learning point......any referee that doesn't instinctively reach for red when called a cheat need to take up crocheting or something similarly harmless.

:confused:
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+1
 
Another response I didn't expect.... :rolleyes:

I always aim to keep 22 men on that field, unlike some who openly admit to knowing who they are going to send off before the game starts! The OFFINABUS sanction is about judgement, opinion and interpretation.

You may be offended being called a cheat, personally I could not give a damn what people think about me. I wasn't offended by it or insulted, I found it petulant and unnecessary.
 
RegalRef said:
There's nothing worse you can call me on the pitch than a cheat. Nothing.

Was it a straight red in the end then, for the second comment?
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Absolutely.

Brian, I get what your saying, of course but I wasn't offended or insulted. That is the offence we send them off for. Maybe that's a bit naive of me but, I dealt with it in the way I saw fit. The team were a few goals down, up against it all game and chasing shadows. He'd not said a great deal all game and was someone that wasn't on my "watch out for this guy" list. I genuinelly believe it was a moment of frustration that got the better of him. As players past and present, we've all been there with those moments of frustration and said things without thinking.

I was having a good game up to then (and after), thankfully backed up by a few on the touchline including another referee. I thought I dealt with the situation exactly how I should have.

As I said before, I don't care what people think about me. If they want to question my integrity, that's their prerogative. I couldn't give a monkeys so long as I know different. Yes he shouldn't have said it, but as I said, the moment took over for him I think.

Red card, his team lost and had to battle without him for almost a third of the game, they then had the 60 mile return leg to make in the bus... That together with a fine and ban, I like to think he's learnt his lesson.
 
DB said:
Absolutely.

Brian, I get what your saying,
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You so obviously don't...
DB said:
of course but I wasn't offended or insulted. That is the offence we send them off for. Maybe that's a bit naive of me but, I dealt with it in the way I saw fit. The team were a few goals down, up against it all game and chasing shadows. He'd not said a great deal all game and was someone that wasn't on my "watch out for this guy" list. I genuinelly believe it was a moment of frustration that got the better of him. As players past and present, we've all been there with those moments of frustration and said things without thinking.

I was having a good game up to then (and after), thankfully backed up by a few on the touchline including another referee. I thought I dealt with the situation exactly how I should have.

As I said before, I don't care what people think about me. If they want to question my integrity, that's their prerogative. I couldn't give a monkeys so long as I know different. Yes he shouldn't have said it, but as I said, the moment took over for him I think.

Red card, his team lost and had to battle without him and they had a 60 mile return leg to make... That together with a fine and ban, I like to think he's learnt his lesson.
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@Padfoot was right, you are LWR. It is a dismissal every time, every time without fail. If you don't you're letting everyone else down.
 
You obviously referee for a completely different reason than I!

Your CFA must make a mint!
 
My first ever red card was to a 14 year old girl calling me a cheat.

It's a pretty standard response DB, to issue a red. The girl called me a cheat when the opposition made it 5-1. Made no difference to my course of action.

If the player in question had given you his name and you issued a caution, what affect would that have on your match control? What would players think of you after that incident? They think they could get away with quite a bit I imagine then your match control would be seriously tested.
 
DB said:
Absolutely.

Brian, I get what your saying, of course but I wasn't offended or insulted. That is the offence we send them off for. Maybe that's a bit naive of me but, I dealt with it in the way I saw fit. The team were a few goals down, up against it all game and chasing shadows. He'd not said a great deal all game and was someone that wasn't on my "watch out for this guy" list. I genuinelly believe it was a moment of frustration that got the better of him. As players past and present, we've all been there with those moments of frustration and said things without thinking.

I was having a good game up to then (and after), thankfully backed up by a few on the touchline including another referee. I thought I dealt with the situation exactly how I should have.

As I said before, I don't care what people think about me. If they want to question my integrity, that's their prerogative. I couldn't give a monkeys so long as I know different. Yes he shouldn't have said it, but as I said, the moment took over for him I think.

Red card, his team lost and had to battle without him for almost a third of the game, they then had the 60 mile return leg to make in the bus... That together with a fine and ban, I like to think he's learnt his lesson.
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Do you not find having your integrity questioned offensive?

You have made a number of excuses for him there mate. Perhaps that's the player in you coming out.

Lost his head or whatever or not, not our problem. The moment that sh¡t leaves his mouth we HAVE to deal with it.
 
DB said:
Absolutely.

Brian, I get what your saying, of course but I wasn't offended or insulted. That is the offence we send them off for. Maybe that's a bit naive of me but, I dealt with it in the way I saw fit. The team were a few goals down, up against it all game and chasing shadows. He'd not said a great deal all game and was someone that wasn't on my "watch out for this guy" list. I genuinelly believe it was a moment of frustration that got the better of him. As players past and present, we've all been there with those moments of frustration and said things without thinking.

I was having a good game up to then (and after), thankfully backed up by a few on the touchline including another referee. I thought I dealt with the situation exactly how I should have.

As I said before, I don't care what people think about me. If they want to question my integrity, that's their prerogative. I couldn't give a monkeys so long as I know different. Yes he shouldn't have said it, but as I said, the moment took over for him I think.

Red card, his team lost and had to battle without him for almost a third of the game, they then had the 60 mile return leg to make in the bus... That together with a fine and ban, I like to think he's learnt his lesson.
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I don't want to cover ground that has been done to death on here several times over.....so I'll just say that there is no requirement for anyone to actually feel offended, insulted or abused....the offence is for someone to use offensive, insulting or abusive language or gestures.
Just consider that some words, phrases or gestures can be designed to offensive, insulting or abusive by their very nature regardless of whether they achieve the desired result.

It's the action that we are punishing not the result.
 
NERef, I genuinely do not believe it would have been affected. I'd controlled the game well, without incident before and after that moment. Even if he'd given me his name and run along, he'd have then bit under scrutiny for the rest of the game.

@RegalRef personally, no. I know different and every other person on the field agreed with me. The atmosphere suggested that, the comments after suggested that.

Maybe it was the player in me coming out... Understanding a bit of frustration, I'm there quite often. Had he been in trouble with me previous to this, he'd have walked. But this was the first time I'd called him over to have a chat and the first time I'd seen/heard him violate the LOTG. The game was a good one, it was flowing well and the players, other than the few obscenities and constant appeals, were a pleasure to officiate for.

As far as refereeing goes, I've only been qualified since October. The reason why I got into refereeing is to try and resolve the problem in Cornwall with the lack of referees. The league I play in alone, before the rainy months came along, we were getting up to 19 games a week postponed due to no ref! I'm not as experienced as most on here but I believe that I'm as fair as they come, there's two sides to a coin.

Obviously people have their opinions and I respect every persons right to have one, but in this situation, this game, this environment and in the spirit of this particular game, I think I made the right call according to my judgement at that time. A few on here disagree, my ref. sec. said I should have sent him off. After my explanation on the phone (easier to talk than type) he understood my logic which is what I wanted to hear. He understood the logic, but also said he would have red-carded after being called a cheat.
 
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