2 teams at the foot of the County League yesterday. Big game on a very sticky pitch with plenty of wind about. For 93 mins I know I've reffed it really well. 3 yellows, no bad tackles,in complete control.
Last minute (away team 1-0 up), away corner is headed clear and a shot comes in which hits the home teams defenders outstretched arm and I immediately give a pen, it's a very clear handball. I'm looking through a lot of players as I give the decision and straight away I think I've made a mistake, it could well be outside the box. Whichever I go from here I've got one very unhappy team and management team because it really could have gone either way and my view just wasn't clear to know for sure but gut feeling and considering the body position after the ball hit the hand I think its outside and I've decided to overturn my decision. I go to the CAR (no NARs in this league since covid due to lack of refs) who I've worked with 4 previous times this year who's as honest as they come and he is also unsure so I change my decision and give a free kick. I must be clear here, I wish I'd have stayed with my original decision now, but I'm also comfortable with the face that it was so close that I'm 60/40 the right decision was reached. We don't have VAR and we do what we think is right and we also make mistakes, I'm very comfortable with that.
What happened afterwards was as expected. Home team go mad and this ends up with sin bins. Home AR (said he was a level 5 ref at the start) runs on the pitch from 50 yards away and gets involved. Free kick is eventually taken and missed and a minute later its full time. I then have practically every home team player and every member of the management team giving me dogs abuse after the game. A fan doing the same stud next to his little girl which was the only thing that will effect an old dog like me, I couldn't believe that. I could've carded every one of the management team but after offering my explanation and it being refused to continue the abuse I just walk off. Secretary came in my changing room to pay me and continues the debate, at least without abuse but he's very keen to tell me that I've relegated them, so he's obviously told to leave. I walk to my truck and again I've got the manager visibly shaking his head at me etc. First time I've not gone in the bar after a game for a long time, I'm just not welcome.
It's genuinely water of a ducks back. Far too long in the tooth to be effected by such stuff. Like one ref once said, once you see football as a drama and not a game you never worry again and thats very true.
What I'm here to write about and gauge opinion on is the enjoyment of refereeing and how its slowly dissipating. I've said this on here before but as the season has gone on my enjoyment has reduced considerably. I've decided to fulfill March's fixtures as I've never come off a game in my 5 years as a ref, but then that will be that this season. I've actually had a fantastic season in terms of observer marks (averaging 75 over 5 games at 5-4), had a few step 5 middles in my first season above park football etc. Couldn't have gone better. But its just the way we referees are spoken to/at so consistently, so often, by so many people that grinds my gears. I'm too proud a person to take it. The last few lines I've done (senior) I've just heard so much abuse towards the ref and I find that worse. Behaviour, which was already toxic, is getting worse and I'm not sure I'll bother next season. If I want money I can work every weekend for far more, if I want exercise I'll play vets football. Or maybe I'll rediscover the enjoyment of refereeing, but it feels more of a slog than an enjoyable way to spend 50/60 days/evenings a year at the moment.
Venting over. I hope you all had better games and more fun this weekend!
Last minute (away team 1-0 up), away corner is headed clear and a shot comes in which hits the home teams defenders outstretched arm and I immediately give a pen, it's a very clear handball. I'm looking through a lot of players as I give the decision and straight away I think I've made a mistake, it could well be outside the box. Whichever I go from here I've got one very unhappy team and management team because it really could have gone either way and my view just wasn't clear to know for sure but gut feeling and considering the body position after the ball hit the hand I think its outside and I've decided to overturn my decision. I go to the CAR (no NARs in this league since covid due to lack of refs) who I've worked with 4 previous times this year who's as honest as they come and he is also unsure so I change my decision and give a free kick. I must be clear here, I wish I'd have stayed with my original decision now, but I'm also comfortable with the face that it was so close that I'm 60/40 the right decision was reached. We don't have VAR and we do what we think is right and we also make mistakes, I'm very comfortable with that.
What happened afterwards was as expected. Home team go mad and this ends up with sin bins. Home AR (said he was a level 5 ref at the start) runs on the pitch from 50 yards away and gets involved. Free kick is eventually taken and missed and a minute later its full time. I then have practically every home team player and every member of the management team giving me dogs abuse after the game. A fan doing the same stud next to his little girl which was the only thing that will effect an old dog like me, I couldn't believe that. I could've carded every one of the management team but after offering my explanation and it being refused to continue the abuse I just walk off. Secretary came in my changing room to pay me and continues the debate, at least without abuse but he's very keen to tell me that I've relegated them, so he's obviously told to leave. I walk to my truck and again I've got the manager visibly shaking his head at me etc. First time I've not gone in the bar after a game for a long time, I'm just not welcome.
It's genuinely water of a ducks back. Far too long in the tooth to be effected by such stuff. Like one ref once said, once you see football as a drama and not a game you never worry again and thats very true.
What I'm here to write about and gauge opinion on is the enjoyment of refereeing and how its slowly dissipating. I've said this on here before but as the season has gone on my enjoyment has reduced considerably. I've decided to fulfill March's fixtures as I've never come off a game in my 5 years as a ref, but then that will be that this season. I've actually had a fantastic season in terms of observer marks (averaging 75 over 5 games at 5-4), had a few step 5 middles in my first season above park football etc. Couldn't have gone better. But its just the way we referees are spoken to/at so consistently, so often, by so many people that grinds my gears. I'm too proud a person to take it. The last few lines I've done (senior) I've just heard so much abuse towards the ref and I find that worse. Behaviour, which was already toxic, is getting worse and I'm not sure I'll bother next season. If I want money I can work every weekend for far more, if I want exercise I'll play vets football. Or maybe I'll rediscover the enjoyment of refereeing, but it feels more of a slog than an enjoyable way to spend 50/60 days/evenings a year at the moment.
Venting over. I hope you all had better games and more fun this weekend!
indeed. No consolation needed tbh, it's just another day in the middle. The concern for me is the gradual decrease in my enjoyment of refereeing as the season progresses. I'm getting tired of being spoken to like a mug and tired of seeing it happen to others.
